Recently, I'm struggling, I mean really struggling with making a commitment to myself and staying committed to my decisions. I'm not sure if my decision making process if severely flawed - which I'm willing to explore, or if I'm afraid of extra responsibility that comes with making decisions.
"Should we rent our extra house until the market gets better, or just unload and sell it?"
"Should I expand my current business, or do I just make what I'm doing better?"
The opportunities to make quality decisions affects the quality of your life every single day, some on a larger scale than others, but still affects our everyday living. Let me explain further.
The one thing I've discovered is that by not making a decision IS making a decision. There's power that lies in making a decision, and the less you use that power, the more powerless you become, over yourself, over your goals and over your own options. Your direction in life will stem from whatever may happen to you, not a destiny you create.
As a fitness professional, I teach fitness classes 6 days a week, some of those days I teach up to 2-3 classes back to back which may sound overwhelming but it's what makes me tick, gets me high. Whether I'm lecturing or teaching physical movement classes, I love to share my fitness enthusiasm with others because I truly believe if people feel really good it will improve their outlook in life, which in turn will allow them to treat others better, which in turn makes the world a better place to live. I know this sounds naively optimistic, but it's what drives me.
At the beginning of my classes/PT sessions I have clients come to me expressing their goals and how excited they are to finally be able to get into one of my classes as they have heard from others about the great results they get from taking my classes. My first response is always,
"Is that all they told you or did they fail to mention anything about how much work goes into making those changes?
"Are you committed to the decision you've made to change your body?"
questions are usually received with blank stares but I do want them to
think about their decision; their commitment. The truth to the questions
always comes out later about their level of commitment.
the only one with this decision-commitment problem. Other people need
help in this area as well.
Do you ever question why you were so willing to abandon your commitments and give half-hearted attempts in your workouts when things get tough? Or maybe you find yourself doing all the things you don't want to do even though you know it won't get you any closer to your goal. Perhaps maybe your commitment does not match your decision. Wishing for what your want physically and wanting to do the work for them to get them are two different things entirely.
You have to find that place within yourself and commit to it. Showing up is half the battle, there is still considerable work to put in on your part once you show up. It is just as important to me to help you become better
committed to your decisions as it is for me to provide a safe,
effective yet challenging workout. If you are just going through the motions without that connection to what you want and what you're willing to do to get it, then you will inevitably end up back to where you started pretty quickly.
To help you become a more committed decision maker, you need first realize that different
actions produce different results. As simplistic as that may sound,
really think about the reality of that sentence. Take control of your
consistent actions. Ask yourself the following questions:
"What precedes all your actions?"
"What is the father of all action?"
For your decisions to make a difference in your life you have to decide what results you're committed to. Most people don't make those kinds of committed decisions, they make excuses instead.
The best way to make a better decision is to make more of them. Learn from each of them, even the bad ones. Do not be discouraged if you make a bad decision because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward. It gets better the more often you do it. Making decisions is the same as working your muscles, it gets stronger the more often you do it.
Take control of these three decisions and you can sculpt your experiences and design your own life:
ACTIVELY DECIDE WHAT TO FOCUS ON EACH MOMENT YOU'RE ALIVE.
Your decision about what to focus on is shaping how you think, what you
feel and what you do. Even if it sounds hokie, just try it; what do you
have to lose? If you want to feel better, focus on things that make you
feel better, not on what you're lacking.
Decide WHAT THINGS MEAN TO YOU?
No matter what's happening around you. What does this mean and how does this affect my future, my present or my past?
WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW?
It's not what's happening
right now, or even in your past that determines who you become, but
rather it's your decision about what to focus on and what things mean to
you and what you're going to do about them that will determine your
ultimate destiny. If anyone is having more success than you in any area,
whether it is weight loss and feeling great, financial success, or a
great relationship, it's because they're making these 3 decisions
differently than you in some way. Be directed by your own values not the
current flow of the environment. Whatever challenges you face presently
could have been avoided by different quality decisions. Having the faith to step out in the first place increases your faith and your circumstances to apply it and do it repeatedly. If you never try, you will never know. Instead of thinking about what may happen if you fail, think about what may happen when you succeed.
After finding the answers to these three important reflective questions, it's time to look to master your decision-making approach. There is a 4-step process for achieving decision-making success:
Clearly decide what you want - what it is that you are absolutely committed to achieving;
Anyone can succeed on a large scale in decision-making by taking these steps. Understand that the power of a truly committed decision that is acted upon no matter what the conditions are on a continual basis is what brings you the results you want. If there's no new action, you haven't really decided.
Make your decisions intelligently, make them quickly, and make them often. Don't labor over a decision. You know you've made a true decision when action flows from it. The more decisions you make the better you get at it and this will help you to learn from your decisions. There's going to be times when you make bad decisions, but be sure you learn from them, but don't dwell on them.
Stay committed to your decision, but stay flexible in your approach. For example, if you're a 5"4" female and you had a goal in the beginning to reach 115 lbs before you learned about how important body composition is and you've reached 135lbs 17% body fat, feel and look the best you have in your life, then celebrate and move on to your next commitment to yourself. Make sure you show flexibility because circumstances can change at any moment that you may or may not need to take heed to in order to make an educated decision.
Enjoy making the decision. The people who are succeeding at something they want aren't better people than you, they're just making better quality decisions. Remember, a truly committed decision is the force that changes your life. You'll be empowered to take control of the force that shapes your life.