Most people are afraid of failure. I feel like never trying is the fail. I don't know what that's like to be afraid of failure? That's not to say I haven't failed, I think I've just learned to view what didn't work differently. Even still, I'm sure you agree, it certainly depends on perspective.
For me, I think the NOT trying makes you feel far worse than trying and failing. At least now I know what does not work and I can scratch that off the list.
I had ran track since about the 3rd grade. I never lost a race. Ever. Even all through grade school. When I got to high school, it was a very different thing.
The first time I competed in high school I remember it vividly. I thought I was the shit. I remember setting up in the starter blocks all cocky and arrogant. As we settled into our blocks and were perfectly still the gun went off and so did we.
As if it were some cruel joke, I noticed no matter how much gas I put into it, I could not make a dent in the lead girl's space between her and I. Not. A. Dent.
Hell, while we're at it, I didn't even make a dent in the 2nd girl, the 3rd, or 4th! I came in 5th. There were only 7 of us. Can you say #FAIL! At least that's how I viewed it in my mind back then.
After they collected who placed what, names, and times, I kept walking, I didn't know where to. I left my sweats, change of shoes on the field and just kept walking until I was standing under some bleachers where I started crying.
I stayed there sulking, until my coach found me, obviously relieved from his panic with my shoes and sweats clutched in his hand. He wanted to give me a pep talk, I hate pep talks & he knew that. "This is your new beginning". That's all he said and handed me my sweats.
I've been humbled ever since. Honestly. It was a valuable lesson that taught me so much and I'm grateful to have learned it early in my life.
After that incident, I worked my ass off to qualify a few times for state and competed well. I wasn't looking to make a scholarship out of it or anything, but to prove to myself that I could improve significantly if I just put my mind and heart into it.
Failure is good on so many levels, it just depends on your perspective.
Edison replied, "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps." Great success is built on failure, frustration, even catastrophy.
Albert Einstein did not speak until he was 4-years-old and did not read until he was 7.
When people approach me about weight loss or lifestyle change, if they are of the hurried mentality and think that they have to get everything perfect in their approach and there's nothing I can do to talk them out of it, I already know how their story's going to end.
If you've convinced yourself that you have to do it perfectly from the outset you are setting yourself up for exhaustion and disappointment.
You know the saying, "Success is about the journey, not the destination". If you take notes from your failures and learn from them, you will get to know yourself faster and the changes you make stick around.
What comes fast doesn't last and what lasts doesn't come fast.
Ever hear of predicted failure? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Predictive_failure_analysis It has to do with computers, but could easily be applied to life.
Predicted failure could be understood as a beta test. It's your very best at the time of your first try. This is all dieting, lifestyle change, and clean eating is.
Think of every attempt as a beta test or a dry run. You have every opportunity to fix the bugs along the way. It's when you stop and give up at first "fail" that is the true fail. If you've somehow made it to this page, then you are still trying ;o)
Failures may be painful, but it's the only way to find out who we really are. Stop trying to skip the struggle and the pain, it's part of life and growth. It doesn't mean you have to stop.
Failure is an option. Perspective is the reality YOU create.
To your (continued) success. - XO